Urinal Etiquette

Things I have noticed in a urinal that I think everyone needs to know.

1. if someone is standing in one stall do not use the stall next to him, use the alternate one. That’s the almighty first rule! Breaking this means you are gay.
2. while doing your business, whistling is allowed, although singing is absolutely prohibited. It disturbs the flow of the other urinators! Unless you are whistling the start of “patience” by guns and roses and continue with the lyrics!
3. please focus on the job at hand. Do not try and make idle conversation with the person next to you. Taking a piss is not a social scene!
4. Peeping is definitely NOT allowed! It is allowed however if you want to be beaten up with pissy hands!
5. smoking is allowed, but do not ask the person next to you to hold your cigarette. Because the person next to you busy holding something else. Unless its weed!
6. if drunk while in a urinal use your head, against the wall for balance. Using shoulders, hands, legs and other appendages will cause ure aim to get off and you’d probably get piss over someone elses shoes. In which case you should be glad you are drunk. You wont feel the pain of someone’s fist in your face!
7. while finishing off do not shake with large motions. It might give the person next to you an inferiority complex. Unless you are deliberately trying to do so.
8. do not push anyone in a urinal, turning around it a reflex action.
9. Sounds like “Whooo” and “ooooohhh” and “Fuuuucccckk” are perfectly justified. If anyone disagrees. They just don’t understand the value of a good piss!
10. you cannot shake goodbye under any circumstance. Don’t even offer!

Lets Talk Music

The Track Playin on the blog is composed by me! Vocals are sampled by my good friend sam. listen, download & enjoy. got 2 more tracks recorded and waiting to u guys to listen to. They will follow shortly. This ones called shattered trance. The original is called Shattered. A love song for the ones who got away...

listen and enjoy!!!

The price of Dude-ness

First let me explain the term ‘Dude-ness.’

Dude is the guy who enters where there are a group of people and everyone looks at home and goes “hmm interesting”. Everyone wants to be around him, everyone complements him and just basically give small talk to fill in their shallow poser lives.

Dude-ness is basically what a Dude has.

There are two things that happen when a guy has Dude-ness. The general public will either love him, or hate him. And both those kind of people will swing around like a bisexual at an orgy. The reason they love him is because there’s a certain amount of respect of the guy for achieving the Dude-ness and they will hate him because 70 percent of the male populous have self esteem issues.

Now the 30 percent of the people who actually think you are cool and accept the dude-ness will never get close to you because they are so comfortable and secure with their lives that they don’t really bother with you. They think you are cool and its left at that. There’s the exception of close friends and stuff but other than that you are pretty much flying solo.

Here’s my point…

Individuality is one big shit storm. General public just cant accept the fact that you are different. I don’t like to follow standard norms of function, which leads bunch of judgment. As much as I hate it I have to accept it. I am different from the rest of the world, people are gonna have something to say about it. They just don’t understand individualism.

The price of Dude-ness is loneliness…

Cause only you can understand who you really are…

And the Winner is!!!

Conmanfor getting the answer close to right first and second place goes to Casablanca for atleast guessing it had something to do with christmas. The Object is a ceramic Christmas tree! i know it was kinda tough, ill try and put simpler ones the next time...

December Cover pic

Any guesses to what the thing actually is?

Got the blues.

I’ve been sitting with my guitar singing sappy love songs for the last couple of days. it doesn’t help that one of my walls are painted blue just to remind me of that bluey feeling. True that I miss my girlfriend, and theres nothing I can do about it for now. So ive been downloading smallville, just to kill time. For those who don’t know what smallville is, it’s the story of clark kent before he became superman. Quite a good series. Especially for me cause they’ve taken a small concept and taken it 2 a whole new level. U know me and concepts.

So anyways there was this scene where he’s standing alone at his prom and lana lang(his love of his life) walks in. they play this song called you and me by lifehouse(playin on my blog). I don’t know what happened to me but I was like cheering him on!!! I mean, what the fuck? Here I am, late in the night, sitting at the edge of my bed, arms in the air shouting “fucking, Fucking, Fucking.

When people such as myself, behave in ways that are reminiscent of a camel whose balls have been tickled, certain amount of analysis is required.

Here’s my take on the happy camel…

As fictional as it was, it stirred up memories of when I used to long just to see her face… insecurity of whether she likes me or just being polite. How could a being as perfect as her want to talk to me? She has a choice of soo many guys… what does she see in me…

And the moment when ure lips make contact. The shuddering of your heart. The nervousness, the speech impediment, trying soo hard not to show ure scared…

Lifes got some awesome episodes. For that minute, when Clark sees lana, all I could think of was how thankful I am for those memories, as immature as they were… I know they wont come back cause I am smarter now and the naivety of relationships are long gone…

So if u do see or think about something that makes u wanna do the camel ball tickle. Go ahead and shout your heart out. Its just life giving you a nice subliminal flashback!

I miss you bev!

Conversation with the ceiling 005

Topic: religion

As touchy and as much as I try to stay away from this topic, the other day I did do something talking with my ceiling about it. There was just too much going for me to not think about it in the twilight of bedtime. Religious fanatics please do not continue from this point on cause I don’t want to read your insane banter on my reverbs page!

Considering all that’s been happening and how everyone around the world is behaving in the name of religion, I wonder how much stock goes into the fact of fighting for ones religion. And, not trying to be politically correct, I’m talking about all religions.

See this is the way I look at it. Most people have no choice in what religion they practice. And let me tell you why. Religion is a descendent concept. Chances are that an individual practices the religion his/her parents practice. No one is born knowing about what religion he is going to be put in. The concept of religion, as important as it may be, could find its biggest flaw as well as its only means for continuity here.

That was one point. Here’s, the other. No normal person has an objective view of religion. Meaning that he/she has nothing to compare it to. Its like going to buy a new pair of shoes. You just buy the ones you see first instead of trying others on. There are only a handful of people born without any religion. And those are the prime candidates to choose their own religion and be proud of choosing that religion. And the truth is that if your parents don’t inculcate the concept of religion inside you, you probably wont bother with it anyways. And we on the other hand judge those who don’t have any religion to practice. Instead they actually have one less thing to have wars over.

Don’t be stupid people! Get the objective view…

You probably would be waging holy wars and too if you were born in that religion. So think twice about it before you get all righteous about what religion you practice!

Gods having a party and the strobe lights are on!

this is not a great picture at all. its taken by communicator. its not clear, its not artsy and all in all notin much to look at.

BUT!

i took this picture of a ligtening storm here in qatar at 4 in the morning comming back from a club. meaning that i shot a lightening rod which lasts for 1/10th of a second, pitch drunk and on a camera phone...

go ahead you try it!

Brightest Grim!

this was the view outside my office window this morning. the sky mostly and only gets deep blue in winter here. what got me to take a pic was the duality of what i was seeing. as beautiful as the sky and the clouds looked there still was this air of dark power looming behind the clouds. makin what is bright white into a dark black cloud of grim...

Strange and stupid ideas in the history of strange and stupid ideas!

Soap on a string.


I’m not sure of how many of you have actually seen this or used one of these things. Its just pastel colored animal shaped cheapy soap, which had a string, attached to it. Till just about an hour ago I thought it was an Indian thing. But then this Canadian colleague of mine told me that they had it there too.

Here’s the strange and stupid part:
The shape of the thing served no practical purpose whatsoever. The ones ive seen was a really ugly fish, and shell. To add to the idiotism of shape, the makers of this product decided to add string to the top of it. I still cant figure out why the heck I would need to hang my soap? Do I need to dry my soap? Or maybe it’s a wall ornament? Either ways I still wouldn’t hang it anywhere. The last thing I would need is a pink colored fish hanging around in my bathroom.

Speaking of color. The pale pastels of the soap, as mundane as it is, was the only thing that gave it some kinda soapy appeal. Not to mention the size of the dam soap. I thought dove and pears made some monster size soap. But this one takes the cake. I could easily used it as a blunt weapon if someone attacked me in my sink or bathroom. It had a string and everything to swing it around.

Conclusion:
Soap on a string is a carefully camouflaged weapon. To be used in the shower against unsuspecting bathroom killers. Imagine the scene from that classic movie psycho… if the woman had a soap on a string!

Everybody Chill! We’ve got Bigger problems!

What the heck is wrong with everyone these days? Is it just the people I meet or is it this country? Everyone’s always upset with something or someone insignificant.

“Oh! He said this!”
“she did that”
“I don’t trust him/her”
“how could he do this man?”
etc etc

im not complaining about the bitching. That’s ok. What I’m complaining about is the fact that the people I know are concerning themselves with problems that are really quite insignificant. Getting upset and all rattled up about things that are not personal is just down right trivial to me these days.

Don’t get me wrong. This crap that im giving right now may seem a little righteous, but it’s the truth. I really don’t give a fuck!

See, this is the way I look at it: If it’s not personal, I shouldn’t be getting upset about it. I mean, what’s the point. To some extent I do consider myself as a goal orientated person. And every time I seem to get upset with someone I just take a step back and look at the bigger picture. And trust me on this one. The bigger picture rocks!

Like why do I care of what my friends think of me and what I do. In the end of the day im happy for myself and happy doing what im doing. Everyone else who is does not effect my life in anywhich way is really quite like furniture on the walls… irrelevant.

This is a PSA to all those battling with issues of frustration and irritation among peers or colleagues. If you cant wipe them off the face of the planet with a ray gun then theres no point getting upset over it.

Sit back. Relax and enjoy the ride.

Life is fun, if you don’t take the idiots seriously…

Conversation with the ceiling 004

i have a bone to pick with disney. as everyone knows im a big animation buff. so after dinner last night i was watchin disney's house of mouse. its not one of my fav cartoons to watch but theres nothin better on tv at that time.

so anyways there was a short clip of goofy. goofy is by far the funniest character on that show and then i started thinkin...

Goofy is a dog!

mickey-mouse. donald-duck. and goofy is a dog!

i have no problems that goofy is a dog. its got the long ears and eveything. not a smart dog, but hes a dog none the less. so lets say that hes a dumb dog.

ugyuck!!!

see, heres where my problem arises. what the fuck is pluto then?
hes a dog too... and hes kinda smarter than goofy. but then howcome hes a dog and cant talk? and how come he wears no clothes. How can he be a dog too? I mean what the fuck?

TIBO. no.2

Im like your puppy dog who always catches your frisbee!!!


Refer 1st TIBO

The Band





The front man!










Crowd Going insane







me & sam



Full story available on Rohits Blog

Coversation with the Ceiling 003

Topic: Clarity!


ever sit to wonder how to clear up all that mess in your head?


i dont know how it happened. But i do know when it happened. It takes a while to sink in but the truth of the fact is that if u go through a shithole, chances are u come out smelling so bad you dont really care anymore.


Clarity!

The Pearl Experience!

Its 8:39 and im late. I drive up to the securtity guard and he tells me… “Sir, no parking here” I flash my card…

:oh! Sorry sir… go right through”

the car is parked and then begins the whiskey shuffle towards the gates where stands a man 6 foot and full of muscle. He asks: “do you have a reservation sir?” I flash my card.

“Welcome Mr. Clinton.”

The gates are opened by what looks to me like two young gorgeous eastern European women. Who in the most politest of fashion ask me. “where would u like to be seated sir, by the bar or on the couches?” I said. “the bars fine, im meeting someone here, thanks anyways”

She says, “your welcome Sir. Have a good time”

I sit at the bar with some colleagues and the lead bartender comes and up to me with a hand & asks: how’s it going mate? What would you like to drink?

I said: “id like a pint of beer and some almonds”

He said: “beer?, the last time you were really enjoying my long island ice tea’s?


I said: “just a beer tonight my friend, and its quite cool you remembered what I was drinking the last time:

He said: “hey, that’s my job!”

The night went on and the few photographs were taken. The manager came up to me and asked me : “Clint, long time no see. Glad to see you here. Hope you are enjoying yourself”

Two beers were over and I had to get back to the grind the next day. Asked the bartender to close my bill and give me my card.








A few minutes later he says: “here’s your card sir, your drinks are on us! Have a good night Sir!”

Walking out the door I was wondering what the heck did I do to deserve this treatment. I’m not like that rich to be flaunting my shit at the best club in the country. I’m not a celebrity either.






Im just a member of the media!








p.s. Pics from a short shoot at the pearl lounge club at the Doha Marriott Hotel. i love being a photographer.

A world without windows...

As philosophical as that title sounds it more literal than you think. Yesterday I had a bit of a fuckup. And mind you it’s the 3rd fuckup I’ve encountered since.

Since when you ask?

Since I bought myself a computer with the windows operating system (OS).

For long now I’ve been a mac user. Mostly cause my work requires me to use only Macs. Besides the fact that it’s a cool thing to use Macs, its just that they are more reliable and considerably faster than PCs. Don’t get me wrong, growing up I didn’t always have a Mac but those were the days when Windows 95 and 98 were around, the times of fewer crashes and lesser updates.

I had bought myself a Mac powerbook G4 4 years ago. It was real expensive and quite delicate to handle. But u know what. That laptop with its few cosmetic issues still functions the same as when I bought it. Of course the new application requirements do make the comp a little slower but not once did it bloody crash on me. And if it was gonna do something anything close to a unwanted restart it would bloody warn me. Very unlike its counterpart, the pc, who feels that hes the boss and controls you.

There’s something about the windows problems that makes me wanna shove pins in my eyes. There’s this sense of insecurity of crashes and viruses you can begin to image. I don’t encounter half of those problems on a Mac.

Lemme tell you these facts.

1: The Mac OS is a better than the Windows OS
any techy will tell you that the mac os has lesser glitches and bugs as compared to a windows os.

2: Windows is cheap and available anywhere:
literally, you can assemble a windows machine ureself with outsourced parts.
You cant do that with a mac as they come bundled straight from the company. I don’t know of any assembled macs.

3: Theres are a lot more virus for Windows
because of point number 2, the bastard hackers and virus makers can fuck with the source code quite easily. Hence the number of crashes and world wide computer viruses.

4: Things in the MAC OS are easy to find.
Its not rocket science. Its just a fucking computer. They simplified everything in the mac. No need to find big manuals and tech support. Everything you need to know and ever will is easy to find and sort out in a mac. Its just more user friendly.



A world without windows would have mac.

Simpler…

TIBO

This is the latest in the series of posts that im gonna put up right here on creative lock. As you all know I have a girlfriend (Bev, who lives in another country at the moment) and I talk to her very often on the net. (Talk not chat). Ever so often I pass these one liners that “I” think are very sweet, but Bev thinks that I have some strange black book of corny one liners that I refer to every now and then. So im posting the one-liners up on the blog in a attempt to check and see if ive subconsciously picked them up from somewhere.

TIBO
(That Is Bloody Original)

“You make me wanna sing love songs!”

the gang on the bike trip. Full story available on rohits blog 

the first pit stop. 

rohit and I. cheeky monkeys! 

sam and kay!!! full on biker people! 

biker boys!!! 

the endless road 

sports mode. so not dressed for the occassion 

tandem riding.  

L-R: Me, lester, jas, cyrus, lindsey, brendan, rohit W, rohit D, Yagnesh, Sam & Kay 

Duality

darkside

Happy Diwali

i found something to burn!

Coversation with the ceiling 2

“You like to think you're never wrong
You have to act like you're someone
You want someone to hurt like you
You want to share what you've been through”

Those lines have been taken from the chorus of a song called Point of Authority by Linkin park. And everytime I hear the song I think of the movie ‘The Ring’.
What does one have to do with the other and me?

Lots!

The song is about being scorned.

The movie is about being scorned.

Its not the fact that the movie and the song send the same message, Its just that none of us get the dam message in real life. Its all about being vindictive.

Ive been really mean and fucked up to people, mostly women. Right now in this present stage of my life, the bearings are right. But I do think of the times the grip on life was a tad loose.

It mostly came when I got cheated. Cheated in love, cheated in friendship… along those lines. My last girlfriend cheated on me like I didn’t exist. The point being that when I found out, I took it out on everybody. Something about being evil turned me on. Treating people like objects without feeling. Is that the kinda person I am? Not really. I am not that selfish an individual that wouldn’t consider other peoples feelings. But I did it anyways. That’s why the last few lines of the song above reflect everything. I wanna make everyone feel what I felt… which was completely miserable. In the movie too, the small kid made everyone live what she went tru.

My take on the whole thing is that we have entered into a vicious cycle of events. Christ and Gandhi are the few people who come to mind who would turn the other cheek. And look what happened to them. All martyrs and saints died cause of doing the right thing and following the virtuous path.

I aint no martyr and I aint no saint. When I am hurt i will take it out on anybody who follows...

I am human!